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1.
this is the end don’t beg for me don’t beg for me a stone hovering my head engraved with the letters of my name i gotta go away but you’ll discover some new lovers and old friends don’t be so sad gotta good feeling we’ll be seeing each other again this is the end summer’s closing and we approach another year the wind outside pushes familiar scents throughout the house along with my regret i want to suppress the memories but they’re the only ones i have left of you so i embrace them all you would encourage me to move on and that’s what i’ll do it’s been a year in the dark but i have hope again and i hope you get the planet earth
2.
Mope 04:47
had a couple of friends they moved on had a cup full of hope, baby i drank it down too soon now i bleed it down the drain pretending to get something done spinnin wheels in a rut writing songs for no reason and these dead dog dreams are like prayers sent off to fake jesus and these skeleton hands hold me well for now but receding flesh making it easy to sleep through i’m a mid life wife with no love whose children moved on with nothing to care for only having thoughts of myself this life is a dull shade of lonely with bitterness undertones encased by a highway we’re never gonna get outta here i try with my bike but i always turn back when i see the clear i see new cuts on your arms each time but you’re deliberately missing the point everyone so eager to leave all the talk of giving up so annoying another day outta work too depressed to touch my feet to the floor if i must spew this shit once more my head will fall off and cuddle visions of blackness dying eyes stare through the tv screen just a floor below me i can hear the brain cavities called commercials rotting minds of loved ones and more so her touch is a weak one i can tell by support needed with my help when did this happen to us i missed so much was it because i’ve been so out of touch cold coffee and tiny pools of blood short lived routine i’m already sick of years wasted that i can’t ever make up becoming so pathetic having all i want encased by a highway we’re never gonna get outta here i try with my bike but i always turn back when i see the clear i see new cuts on your arms each time but you’re deliberately missing the point everyone so eager to leave all the talk of giving up so annoying she calls it a phenomenon using words like a true scholar would boomerang boy that has never been tossed returning home even though he never left i sit and hear my life unfold explicit truths that have never been told enough guilt without the example by 24 i should’ve done so much more
3.
i had no idea i’d have to deal with so many stupid fucking people here i wanted a career where my hourly input saved me from talking for a year and now i’m drinking on the brandy oh just like my daddy did trying to wash the demons clear and now i’m working hard for something in the morning i’ll be nothing hope that i’ll get out of here get wrong get real get wrong get real you had a life that was fed to you but still you ask for the spoon of steel you’re so damn pathetic you tried to be a critic but when you open your mouth you hear oh you hear it this is what it’s like get wrong get real
4.
i’m billy corgan ass naked at a rave trying to play a bullet with butterfly wings and as the neo hippy stoners hear me sing they laugh, give a glance, but don’t think anything i’m stone cold sober in the shower after three it’s cold and it’s dark and humiliating don’t wanna die on a pathetic final plea be a jpeg of a joke on a tweens dashboard screen i don’t know what has gotten into me i was cool and so dark the goth girlies worshipped me time passed me by like it’s passing you by spent so much time in the sour eye squinting at the world, thinking i’m always right i’m still a god i am the definition of music that won’t back down from a fight the kids are stupid they don’t care about my songs i’m the only truth teller who can do no wrong the listeners grew up and gave up on the cause now they all got children, mortgages, and no balls i’ve got impeccable taste, i know you don’t get it not everyone knows the words that you need to describe an insufferable, superfluous scene i don’t know what has gotten into me i was cool and so dark the goth girlies worshipped me time passed me by like it’s passing you by spent so much time in the sour eye squinting at the world, thinking i’m always right i’m still a god i am the definition of music that won’t back down from a fight the business bad boys got it wrong the teeny neon ravers got it wrong the billy boppin cowboy rockers got it wrong and most of all, i got it wrong i don’t know what has gotten into me i was cool and so dark the goth girlies worshipped me time passed me by like it’s passing you by spent so much time in the sour eye squinting at the world, thinking i’m always right i’m still a god i am the definition of music that won’t back down from a fight
5.
Sunday 04:53
give me a reason now that it’s over to get outta bed and stretch these limbs that haven’t worked in forever you asked for little in return and it was denied to see me graduate, get a wife, and bring children into this life i feel you in my bones hear your voice in mine it comes out every once and awhile and makes me feel as if it’s alright you did it 20 oh some years and you did it right i’ll never be half of the man you were the guilt cuts me like a knife and now the future is gone swept out under my feet like a rug if i learned anything it’s how to become a listless plain these dreams reinterpret the scenes equatable to the horror films i frequented as a teen you come to me in pale flesh and fresh wounds just as you were in the fluorescent drenched hospital rooms i wish i could stop seeing you this way forgetting your face would be better than this phase give into that empty room in the back of the house where they torture you can’t anybody hear these voices too i become what you were until i am through and now the future is gone swept out under my feet like a rug if i learned anything it’s how to become a listless plain floating through the nothing and appreciating everything indifference for so many strains just to keep myself staying sane
6.
Robin 04:24
death will free you from your emptiness i hate seeing you in the tv static hiss we watched another star burnout today wondering if by chance or if by the hands that would lovingly create i sit by your bed and we relate the pain is obviously i am a decade or two too late fly robin fly leave this life fly robin fly leave my side fly robin fly leave this life fly robin fly leave this life tonight, tonight constantly being told i’d get a sign staying up late, frightening myself trying to conjure the afterlife everyone around me is delusional always in need of comfort and some false faith for conclusion and will but i know i’ve seen the end and it doesn’t end well in fact, it’s pretty bad for all of us when i was young, i thought i could get away make a clean break for the light without a deafening fate you were a boy with no fear an untarnished image so clear fly robin fly leave this life fly robin fly leave my side fly robin fly leave this life fly robin fly leave this life tonight, tonight
7.
we cut through the overcast like a needle through fabric and in that miraculous moment my thoughts became ever so tragic i was brought down to tears as the bird lifted me so high above those wondrous clouds i started wondering why they defined heaven as a place like this did someone write the holy book just dreaming of the abyss but with no real hope of ever gettin there my stomach churned and i whispered, father, please be near as you were in my younger years holding my hand and tellin me everything’s alright for this plane is just a car ride we’re drifting happily along look at all the buildings outside but i’m seated alone and the light above me tells me to fasten my seatbelt we’re headed straight into the unseen and my fears run wild hinting at a bitter end i look at the vacant seat next to me his image i project and we’re gazing in a horizon divided between the clouds and the sky i hold on for dear life i don’t ask for god i don’t ask for forgiveness my vision blurred by the tears i just want him to know he’s missed so i can rest in this cold tin can visit the one that i love maybe forget some of the past feast my eyes on some new land live up to what i’ve been missing without feelin so bad son you now are finally free take what you have learned so you don’t forget about me now you are on your own you’re on your own now
8.
Car Dealer 03:29
i’m in the middle of something and i don’t like what’s going on he’s got shitty taste you can see it in the shape of his beard on the brink of a panic attack i’ll make this fucking car blow the only air i have is a thick musk of expensive cologne this seatbelt is suffocating and my mind is moving at 45 while my body is seven blocks behind everyone else is on their regular and no one can read my mood i’m too distracted by the cheap talk and that car dealership attitude he brags about the drinks he can get in and still drive fled the scene after goin 80 without a dui i’m so bewildered by the character judgement thus far nothing quite as tiring to keep your manners when there’s nothing to say and you’re trapped in the back in the back of a car this seatbelt is suffocating and my mind is moving at 45 while my body is seven blocks behind everyone else is on their regular and no one can read my mood i’m too distracted by the cheap talk and that car dealership attitude this is me trying hard to care everything about this place is so warped and beyond repair these words are the broken glass of your soul i can crush you in a heartbeat but that’s beyond my control this seatbelt is suffocating and my mind is moving at 45 while my body is seven blocks behind everyone else is on their regular and no one can read my mood i’m too distracted by the cheap talk and that car dealership attitude
9.
(for mike) do you wanna get a little nasty on the pavement floor i know that we don’t see each other much anymore but i thought that i’d write a song with the lyrics that you made in memory of spittin on the floor and the baggy jeans you wore i hope you don’t mind that i took the first line i spent a night’s worth looking through the external hard drive to see what i could find i found a fucking nasty do you wanna get a little bit nasty i see a little jesse boy and all the stupid shows we planned it might not mean much anymore but it won’t stop ringing in my head i’ll be loving you here in my heart and when it’s late and i’m in my bed why’s it so hard to connect in the first place i live so close to my friends but i rarely see a face i put up walls and barricades just to say that i’m okay rather pretend to be strong than make a call cuz that’s the last thing that they need unless they feel the same way and i’m an idiot i’m just so fed up with losing everyone that i’d rather not invest the emotion this was meant to be just a stupid thought maybe something to make you laugh it will never be the same you’re well aware of that reminiscing is all i have i found a fucking nasty do you wanna get a little bit nasty i see a little jesse boy and all the stupid shows we planned it might not mean much anymore but it won’t stop ringing in my head i’ll be loving you here in my heart and when it’s late and i’m in my bed
10.
life long dreams, aspirations dismantle the drumset to put in the basement spoiled children tired of vacation they ate your freedom now where is the sanctum i cannot fathom the years you gave up to them i am too selfish i can sustain in a room forever i can listen to myself i can stare at all these papers i can hold my own conversation i can listen to myself speak forever i am holed up in the shadows thinking about how it struck me one small turn around the corner and the melody wrote itself down i am a sad song a human with no cause in comparison to you who did everything the right way i can listen to myself i can stare at all these papers i can hold my own conversation i can listen to myself i can listen to myself sing forever
11.
Mac 04:43
there’s no gain in being classically trained the kids don’t give a shit unless it gives them a headache and hip hop lives on along with white appropriation some stupid fucking stoner with a mic in mom’s basement who’s quick to tattoo a few roses on his neck some skulls on his forearms and jesus on his hands in this sick, sad world where image means much more than words this punk can make a living as his grade teachers clean the floors if his body contained the slightest bit of melanin he’d be cast out as a criminal that ink would read felon but luckily for him he’s got god on his side as if it wasn’t obvious enough check the cross under his eye it’s another sad boy livin in city suicide the youth gets what they want too young and then they wanna die some pretty little fair skin educated and well shaven goin to a party gonna use plenty of women coax em with the cheap drinks and tell em how daddy thinks the end of the night concludes with rounds of high fives he arrives in a musk entitlement in we trust gotta do something great in life it’s never been enough to work a shitty 9 to 5 and come home to a wife who's always been second best to some young mistress on the side life ain’t ever easy when you constantly get smothered i’m a prime example just as useless as the others this town is one big glass house reputations to be shattered middle school kids armed with rocks aim for windows cuz nothing matters
12.
every middle white case male clown thinks that a good song needs a chorus and a breakdown with some whiny lyrics about livin in mom's house in a boring town oh what a tragedy but i'm not about to break the model this is the only music i fit in naturally plus i fit the mold another useless soul from a loving home and too much pampering but it really struck a note when you closed the door in that man’s face looking for an honest living sorry sir we only serve our kind and this war is alive there’s a fire ablaze right in front of our eyes but our stupid kids only got one thing on their minds how can you feel so bad for yourself when you get everything and everything else give the rope some slack and watch it burn your hands your blisters bubble and break as they are laughing maybe i’m a bad attitude magnet maybe the people i drew were just for thoughts in transit and as they fade away i pay much more attention the sickening ideals are as real as the actions sorry sir we only serve our kind and this war is alive there’s a fire ablaze right in front of our eyes but our stupid kids only got one thing on their minds suicide, suicide

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For my family, friends, and loved ones.

Mastered by: Alex DeYoung (deyoungmasters.com)

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released January 17, 2016

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I Hope You Get The Planet Earth Illinois

My last attempt.
I hope you get the planet earth.

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